Sunday, October 16, 2005

ER 12.4 Blame It On The Rain

Previously on ER: Sally from Third Rock from the Sun introduced herself to Luka as Eve Peyton, the new Nurse Manager, but mispronounced “Kovac” for which he pissily corrected her; Sally mockingly put Morris in his place suggesting he could teach the nurses about dental blocks, to which he replied “what?”; Sally asked Sam about her history with Luka; Luka punched the drug lock-up door; Sally rearranged Sam’s schedule because she didn’t think it was appropriate for Sam and Luka to work together, putting Sam on nights and giving her two less shifts than she is currently working, which she can’t afford and she’ll never get to see Alex; Abby spots Dubenko getting an exam in the Oncology Lab.

Uh oh. This ep is titled “Blame It On The Rain”. Naming a show after a Milli Vanilli song does not bode well, and also now that stupid song is playing in my head and probably will be for the rest of the night. Thanks. Close-up of what looks like a fish tank with a Hummel figure of a kid with a newspaper on his head in the center and is getting filled with water as we hear thunder in the background. Camera pulls back and apparently its sitting on the Admit Desk. Yeah, that makes sense. Frank is pacing and counting “1000, 2000, 3000, 4000”, as Jerry leans on the desk and it looks like he’s praying. Frank walks past Abby who is putting on a yellow rain slicker like I used to wear when I was in kindergarten. She asks him what he’s doing and he says he’s counting. She gets that, but wants to know why. He explains that the time between the lightning flash and the thunderclap tells you how far away the storm is while Abby looks through her wallet. There’s a thunderclap that makes Jerry practically jump out of his skin and Frank says that it’s getting closer. Jerry asks Abby if she’s going outside, which is ridiculous because did he think she was wearing that raincoat as a fashion statement? Because it so is not. She says she drew the short straw for the coffee run. Morris walks by and wants to know where she is going because they are getting slammed. She tells him that her shift doesn’t start for six minutes and that she’s going to get everyone coffee. Walking away Morris tells her to “be a flower drum song” and get him a bear claw and he’ll pay her later. Once again, not even to Opening Credits and Morris is already on my last nerve. As he’s walking away, we see Abby in the background tilt her head back to look back at him from under her hood, which struck me as funny because again, it reminded me of a kindergartner and my five-year old twins did the exact same move when I dropped them off at school in the rain this week.

Morris goes over to a female patient in the Curtain Area who is wearing a neck brace. She also has the exact same red hair color that he does, which really isn’t flattering against the lavender sweater with the rhinestones that she is wearing. I have a feeling I’m going to be all about the hair again this episode. He introduces himself as “Dr. Morris, Chief Resident”, because he insufferably has to say that to everyone. She tells him some guy rear-ended her and he replies “Ooh, ouch. I hope you were driving”, which is such an appropriate thing to say. Already, shut up, Morris! Sally, wearing a way too low cut shirt under her jacket, comes up to Morris and tells him that they are getting backed up and perhaps “we could clear some of these necks clinically”. Morris is a little offended by the royal “we”, and condescendingly tells her that he thinks it’s best if “we left that decision to the doctors”, as he continues to listen to the patient’s chest. And to prove just how incompetent Morris is, the earpiece to the stethoscope is not even in his right ear, but hanging down by his neck, so this is definitely a very thorough exam he’s performing. Sally starts to tell him that if patients meet all five of the nexus criteria, but he interrupts and asks what she knows about nexus. She proudly tells him that as Research Coordinator at Emory, she enrolled 2000 patients in the initial study. He sneeringly replies how that’s really interesting and maybe she can bring it up at her next Nazi nurse rally. That must be the standard Doctor-Nurse Manager put-down because didn’t Luka say the same thing to Abby back in Season 9? Sally has a better comeback than Abby’s “you totally suck” line. Sally tells Morris that with her extensive knowledge of the human anatomy, she could kill him “with this finger”, as she holds up the middle one. He starts to say that he finds it hard to believe, and she pokes him in the chest with it, to which he yells “ow!” Hee.

Weaver walks behind him, slips, but Morris catches her and tells her that he saved her life. He follows her to the Admit Desk bitching how he’s been after them all morning to keep the floors mopped and maybe it’s time he fired some janitorial staff. Weaver is rightfully ignoring him and instead says that maybe it’s time he “cleared some patients”. Morris starts sucking up by telling Weaver that he’s glad she’s “back in the trenches” with them, and she snarks “yeah, that makes one of us”. She wants to know what the problem is, why are they so backed up? Morris starts to explain that they’ve had like twenty paramedic runs, but Weaver waves him off so that Sally can give the details. Sally says that “every E.D. in the city is closed to saturation, which means we’re all open”. She goes on that fender-benders are clogging up the hallways, and looking pointedly at Morris, she says she’s sure that they all don’t need C-spine films. Weaver agrees and tells Morris to “get with it”, because half of the patients don’t need x-rays and she tells him to start “clearing necks” as she and Sally walk away. Jerry is standing at the desk and jumps again when there’s another thunderclap.

Outside in front of Jumbo Mart, Abby’s got her hands full. She steps onto the crosswalk and drops one of her bags. As she bends to pick it up, an SUV comes barreling down, honking and swerves out of the way to avoid hitting her. Abby jumps back as the driver rolls down his window and starts yelling “what the hell’s your problem?” He starts shouting about why she didn’t wait for there to be a break, but stops as she throws a coffee at him. Uh oh, I smell lawsuit. He calls her a “crazy bitch” and starts to drive away as she yells that “it’s a crosswalk, you assh…”, but of course we don’t hear the end of the word because of the water splashing, and she throws another coffee after him. Abby was right that it was a crosswalk and when she started walking there weren’t any cars, and it looked like the guy was going kind of fast in a hospital zone, which I’m sure is not legal. But throwing the coffee? Not a smart move, Abby. I get that almost getting hit rightfully scared the shit out of her, and calling him an asshole was definitely the proper response, but I think channeling Sam and her anger management issues and tossing hot beverages was probably not the right way to go. I wonder if there will be repercussions? Since it’s Abby, most likely not.

Pratt is wiping off the board and reading off what’s going on with his patients to Morris, and then says he’s out of there. Morris says he thought Pratt was going to help Neela clear some x-rays, and he replies that he did and now he’s going home. He points to Ray who is walking by and says “Doc Rock is going to help you out”. Is that any relation to Kid Rock? I guess this is all we are going to see of Pratt this week. And no Mister from the Color Purple either. He was in the “Previously on” in last week’s episode, and then didn’t appear. Danny Glover must be wondering why he agreed to this guest arc if he’s not going to get any screentime. Ray’s like “sorry dude, I’m not working down here today”. Seems Ray is starting his elective in toxicology. Neela bitches that she picked neurology, but she didn’t even get an elective. Morris tells her that’s because she hasn’t completed her “pre-hospital care training requirements”. Neela doesn’t know what he means so he explains that she never did her ride-alongs as an intern, and she needs to do 24 hours in the field with the paramedics. Neela distractedly says she’s been meaning to do that, and Morris tells her to see him when she does and then they’ll discuss her elective options. This must be setting something up to happen to Neela on her ride-along.

Frank bitches at Abby about how long it took her to get the coffee as Abby disgustedly drops the crushed pastry box on the desk. She’s completely soaked. Frank grumbles that the doughnuts are soggy. I’ll answer for Abby here and say shut up, Frank! Truck your fat ass across the street and get them yourself, then. Sam snarks “God forbid you don’t get your morning ration of deep fried fat, Frank”. Hee. Frank takes the doughnuts to try to dry them out in the microwave. Sam asks Abby if she’s okay. Abby says nothing a week in the Bahamas wouldn’t cure. She asks Sam how she is, and Sam complains about Sally sticking her on nights which means less sleep, less money and she barely gets to see Alex. I would think that last one would be a good thing considering how annoying Alex is. Then Sam says she has to have a baby-sitter spend the night with him. That must suck. My babysitter would charge triple-overtime for that. Abby looks at her sympathetically.

Haleh comes in whining about how everyone turns into idiots when it rains, and Abby’s like “tell me about it” as she walks away. Sally wants to know why Haleh is there and Haleh tells her that Connie’s sick and asked her to cover. Sally says she’s already warned Haleh about her overtime. Haleh explains that she wasn’t planning to come in, she was just trying to help Connie out. Sally says she should have told Connie to call someone else. Haleh gives Sally an attitude and asks if she wants her to turn around and go back home. Sally’s says “unless you want another letter in your file”. Haleh stares at her, mockingly says “have a great day” and leaves. Sally then asks Sam if she can stay until they find a replacement. Sam pretends not to hear her so Sally repeats her name and Sam bitchily replies “why not?” Sally walks away and Sam mutters that it’s not like she’d be home in time to see Alex off to school anyway. Sam moves away as Morris walks behind her carrying a bunch of files. He slips and falls and the files go everywhere. I know it’s been done to death, but a good pratfall always gives me a chuckle and Scott Grimes did it perfectly here.

A couple of guys wearing yellow rain slickers like Abby’s, a med student and an orderly are moving a female patient who looks wide awake onto a gurney. Luka walks up and asks who this is. Yellow Slicker #1 tells Luka her name is Blair Collins, she’s 29 and she’s been sent in from Lake Shore Gardens for an infection around her G-tube. Luka presses on her stomach and asks if it hurts. Yellow Slicker #2 tells Luka she’s in a coma. Luka asks since when and YS #1 says “six years”. Luka’ surprised, then realizes what’s going on and tells them no way, they don’t have the room and that she doesn’t need to be there because the nursing home could give her antibiotics and have a doctor there change her G-tube. The Slickers ask what they are supposed to do and Luka says to take her back. They reply that they don’t get paid for round trips and that they have another run. Luka yells after them and Sam, who was standing down the hall, turns to look at him. She asks him what’s wrong and he tells her “nursing home dump”, and Sam just shakes her head and asks “what else is new?” Sam tells him she thinks Trauma Two is open and they start to walk down that way. Sally overhears and calls for Sam to go to triage, as she takes over. Luka says “you’ve got to be kidding me”, and Sam shakes her head and scoffs that it’s okay. She tells him not to worry about it as she walks away. Luka thinks it’s ridiculous and appeals to Weaver, who is standing nearby looking at some films, to do something. Weaver wants to know about what. Luka gestures in Sally’s direction and says “about the way she’s managing the staff”. Weaver tells him that if it’s a nursing issue it’s Sally’s “rice bowl”. Is this another Flower Drum Song reference? She tells them to work it out, as Luka chews on the inside of his cheek and looks up at the ceiling.

Dweebie doctor is explaining to Ray that morning rounds start at 10:00 am, which Ray thinks is good. Dweeb tells him that they discuss their toxicology consultations from the entire county. Looking Ray up and down in a really creepy way, Dweeb tells him that he will carry the pager every third day and that research conferences are on Thursday afternoons. Cut to someone pressing a snake’s head into the top of a beaker and getting the venom to shoot out. Yuck. And there’s lovely hissing sounds to accompany. Ray’s all psyched to see it. He wants to know if it’s poisonous, and Dweeb corrects venomous, yes. He dreamily says he’s studying “neurotoxic factors in crotalid venom”. Ray spots scorpions in a tank and says “oh cool”, then goes over to another tank where there’s a huge snake curled up. Unbelievably, he starts tapping on the glass, which even my five year olds know not to do. Dweeb is upset and yells at him to not do that. Shaking his head at Ray, he gestures for him to follow and tells him that his main focus will be the Poison Control Center. Dweeb explains that they get calls from both the public and other health care facilities. He tells Ray that he’ll have online access to an international database and that they are “here to back you up”. He pushes open the door, where there are a bunch of really large people who have obviously been getting their morning rations of deep fried fat right alongside Frank. They are all sitting with headsets on behind computer screens. Dweeb tells Ray that he’s number two. They all wave at Ray, who turns away looking disgusted.

Doris the paramedic is pulling a patient out of the rig in the downpour as Neela runs over to take it. Doris gives her the bullet that the woman’s name is Judy Anderson, she’s 31, and she was in a head-on collision of auto vs. cinderblock wall. Yikes. Judy’s upset and asking where Grace is. Judy’s obviously confused about what show she’s on because Grace is on with Will an hour and a half before ER. Doris reassures her that she’s coming soon. Neela asks Judy if she’s having any belly pain as Weaver walks up. Damn, ER must have a huge water bill with this episode because it is pouring. Judy says it hurts when she breathes. Neela tells Weaver that Judy has chest pain, with good vitals. In a nice touch, Doris holds a metal clipboard over Judy’s head to try to keep the rain off as she explains to Weaver that there was only one car. Judy’s yelling that she was pushed off the road and that they were driving like maniacs. She keeps asking for her daughter. Doris tells Neela that the baby is in Rescue 73. Neela asks Weaver to take the baby. Weaver looks unsure, but says okay.

Dubenko is commenting “nice work” about an ornate piece of iron. He asks if it’s custom as the camera pulls back and we see it sticking out of a man’s leg. Ouch. The guy tells him that it is, and says it’s Spanish Revival. Abby tells Dubenko that Ancef is on board. She says she thinks it missed the femur and Dubenko says it bagged the femoral artery because the foot is cold. He tells Abby to give him another 50 of fetanyl and take him upstairs. Why is Abby pushing meds? Isn’t that a nurse’s job? Don’t tell me she’s flipped back to that again, because really she was just miserable then. She tells the patient she’ll be right back and follows Dubenko out. Strangely, she’s wearing scrubs this episode. She was wearing them before she went out to get the coffee, so she had them on before her shift started. It’s just weird because I don’t remember her wearing them before since she’s become a doctor, except for when she and Jake changed into them after getting splashed on the way to work last year. Abby calls after Dubenko. He’s wearing a different color scrubs from hers. Do they color-code the departments now? Because I don’t remember Benton and Corday wearing different color scrubs from the ER staff, but whatever. She asks him if everything else is okay. Dubenko says that he thinks the patient will be back to work in a few weeks. Abby meant with him. He’s a little surprised. She continues that she knows it’s none of her business, which we all know has never stopped her before, and explains that she was in oncology last week and saw him. Dubenko gets it and tells her that he had his annual PSA screening. Abby actually says “Oh. Duh” and shakes her head at herself. She starts to apologize to him as he says “it came back 6.5”. She’s taken aback and comments that it’s a little high. Dubenko explains that the needle biopsy showed a “moderately differentiated prostate cancer”. Abby’s eyes widen and she sincerely tells him she’s sorry. He tries to dismiss it that it was caught early, stage T-1, and there’s a good prognosis with surgery. Abby nods encouragingly. Dubenko walks away towards the elevator and tells her he has to get her “ischemic foot boy” upstairs. She calls after him “Um, Lucien?” Lucien??? Guess that explains the “L” on his lab coat. And getting his ass kicked in grammar school daily would definitely explain the quirkiness. He turns towards her, and she continues that if he wants to talk to someone, or get a cup of coffee or something … He looks at her quizzically and says, alright, maybe later, and tells her that would be nice. She nods and says okay.

Abby walks down the hall to Admit and asks Frank if there’s anything besides fender benders. As Frank is telling her about a guy in Number Four who got scalded while driving by the hospital, she looks off in that direction, obviously recognizes who he’s talking about, and walks around to the other side of Frank. Smart move, Abby. Frank’s large enough to be good cover. Frank continues that some “crazy broad” was throwing coffee and the guy thought she was a nurse. Hence, the reason Abby is in scrubs this episode. Abby, glancing around Frank, tells him that it was probably somebody from ICU, and that they are “really wacky up there”. This little exchange was kind of funny.

Sam yells to Abby that she has a man with chest pain as she and another woman are helping him in through the doors. Abby runs over and asks him when it started. The woman with him said about 10 or 15 minutes before and that they came right in. Sam brings over a wheelchair and she and Abby help the guy who I at first thought was Mark Greene’s dad, but realized that it couldn’t be or else this show really has turned into a soap opera. But since he looks a bit like Holling from Northern Exposure, that’s what I’ll call him. Sam asks him what it feels like and he holds his chest and says it’s heavy here. Abby asks if he’s on any medication and he says Lipitor and aspirin. Abby wheels Holling and calls off some tests to Sam, who hurries away. The woman with him who is also wearing an entirely too low cut top and who I recognize as Coach Fox’s daughter Kelly from the show Coach, asks if he’s having a heart attack. Abby tells her that they have to look at the EKG before they can tell as Holling is making all sorts of “I’m in massive pain here” grimaces.

Ambulance doors burst open and the paramedics unload a baby strapped in a car seat that they say is three months old, but this kid is obviously much older and she is kicking her legs rhythmically. Paramedics tell Weaver that she has multiple lacs to the head, face and chest and that she was found outside the vehicle and it looks like she was ejected. Yikes. And she only has lacerations? That must be some car seat. Weaver can’t believe the car seat wasn’t anchored down. Paramedic says that the heart rate is in the 160’s. Weaver asks if they got access, but they said they tried twice but the IV blew. Weaver asks nurse Inez if she’s any good with tiny veins, and Inez says maybe. Weaver says she’ll take that as a yes.

Neela’s in Trauma Yellow and says that the C-spine is clear and to get her off the board. Nurse Dorie tells her that the pulse ox is 97 on two liters. Neela rolls Judy and they remove the back board. A fat cop is asking Judy about whether it was a pickup or SUV that ran her off the road. It was an SUV. She weirdly says it was blue or black, then states that it was definitely black. Neela tells her they are going to sit her up, as they are already doing it. Nice warning, Neela. Judy starts crying that her chest hurts. Fat Cop wants to know if she saw the driver or any passengers. She replies that there were at least two of them and that the driver was a teenager. Fat Cop asks his race, and Judy says he was white, but she’s not sure about the passenger. Neela states that the lungs are clear. Judy tells her it hurts when she breathes and Neela thinks she may have broken her breastbone. Ow. Neela spouts off some tests, which include a head CT, as Fat Cop wants to know more about the vehicle. Judy claims there was a bike rack on the roof and that they tried to force her off the road because they wanted to steal her car. How does Judy know that? Did they say something to her? If so, wouldn’t she be able to identify them better? And how come Fat Cop doesn’t ask her that? Fat Cop is an idiot. Judy asks if she’s bleeding, because obviously she doesn’t know how to use her peripheral vision to see the blood that is practically running into her left eye. Judy’s an idiot too. Neela tells her she hit the window, but it’s not that bad. Judy wants to know if she’ll need stitches. She will. Fat Cop asks if either of them had a weapon. Judy doesn’t know, it happened so fast. She’s getting agitated, so Neela tells Fat Cop that it’s enough for now, Judy has a concussion and needs to rest before going up for her head CT.

Weaver bursts into Trauma Green with Ejector Baby, as Luka is listening to Blair’s chest. He tells Weaver that they’re working in there, and Weaver tells him she has a trauma and needs the room. They move Blair out of the way, and Weaver tells them to go gently as they move Ejector Baby onto the table. Ejector looks pretty calm to me, but starts to cry as Weaver holds her head still. Inez says they are out of infant c-collars. Weaver asks Luka if he knows if they have any, and he tells her to use towel rolls. Weaver says the airway is patent, which the ever helpful Google informs me means it’s unobstructed. Weaver states that she can’t hear breath sounds with all that crying. If the kid is screaming like that, I would think it’s a pretty safe bet she’s breathing. She asks Inez for the sat, but Inez said it won’t pick up. Luka says the kid is pink, so the sat’s fine. Luka looks at Weaver curiously and asks if she wants him to take it. She’s offended that he thinks she’s rusty, which she so obviously is. Didn’t they make a point of having her work in the ER last season and have Susan tell us that Weaver took one shift a month to keep her skills up? Maybe since she’s gone, we’re just supposed to forget everything Susan ever said, which thankfully includes all of her Greek chorusing about Carter and Abby, and her supposedly witty expositions about Chen’s spunky sweater. Again, I really miss Sherry Stringfield. And her hair. Once again, everyone’s hair, including Neela’s surprisingly, is terrible. Though I guess that’s to be expected considering they’ve all gotten caught in the rain. Good thing Abby has that as an excuse this week. Luka bites his tongue. Weaver orders a head CT as the baby stops crying. Weaver’s afraid the baby is becoming apnic. She jostles Ejector a little, and she starts screaming again. Weaver thinks Ejector needs to be tubed, but Luka agrees with me that since the kid is yelling, the airway is obviously fine. Thanks, Luka. Weaver comes back that Ejector needs a head CT, and Luka challenges her that she’s going to submit the kid to the dangers of intubation “just to make things easier for the radiologist”. Luka assures Weaver that Ejector will settle down, she just has to give it a little time, but Weaver doesn’t think the baby has time. Weaver thinks agitation is an early sign of head injury, but Luka thinks it’s an appropriate response to a stressful situation, and reminds her that babies cry when they are scared. Weaver sarcastically thanks him, but tells him Ejector is her patient. She thinks Ejector’s mental status is waxing and waning and she could go apnic in the scanner, but Luka says then “you bag her through it”. Weaver ignores him and asks Inez for sedation. Luka tries to get her to hold on, because she’ll lose the neuro exam if she sedates Ejector, she should just observe her. Weaver’s agitated and retorts “and watch her bleed into her brain? No, thanks.” She tells Inez to push the meds. Luka implores Weaver to look at Ejector because she’s alert, pupils are equal and there’s good tone. Weaver again tells Inez to push the versed. Luka says “c’mon Kerry, we’ve both seen enough head trauma to develop gut feelings about this”. Weaver replies that her gut says Ejector needs a tube. Luka again bites his tongue and watches as Weaver intubates Ejector.

Judy is watching as they wheel Ejector from the Trauma room. She asks Neela where they are taking her. Neela tells her they are taking Ejector to CT. Judy wants to know why she had all those tubes hooked up and why she wasn’t moving. Neela replies that the tube is helping Ejector breathe, and that it is just a precaution because sometimes babies have to be sedated for CAT scans. Judy wants to know if the police have found anything, Neela says it’s still early and that they will. Neela is preparing to stitch up Judy’s face. Judy berates herself that she should have waited until it stopped raining, but Neela tells her that no one can control the weather. Neela explains that her head and belly CT’s were normal, but that she’s broken her breastbone and they’ll need to monitor her heart to make sure it wasn’t bruised. Judy’s not listening and says that she didn’t have to go out and she could have waited. She tells Neela that Ejector was fussy all night and that sometimes a car ride will calm her down. Judy wonders what she’s going to tell her husband and Neela unhelpfully says “need a new car?” Hee. She’s injecting Judy’s forehead to numb her before she puts in the stitches.

Jerry tells Weaver that she has a bunch of phone messages. Weaver hastily goes through them saying no to each, “tell Kayson to stop bothering me”, and that she’ll call Anspaugh back when she gets a chance. Then she says “oh, crap”. Apparently Henry has a birthday party to go to tomorrow. Isn’t he like a year and half? Or have they rapidly aged him like they do on the soaps and he’s a teenager now? Weaver wants Jerry to go to a toy store on Michigan Avenue. Jerry’s panicked because she wants him to go outside. Weaver assures him that it’s just a few blocks and tells him she needs a King Funshine, as anyone who grew up in the 80’s or is currently a parent of a toddler can tell you is a Care Bear, although I thought Funshine was girl, so she must have had a transgender epiphany sometime over the past two decades. Jerry wants to know if Weaver really wants him to go out in the storm. Weaver asks him if he’s afraid he’ll melt, and he counters “what about the lightning?” Because he’s a pretty big target. Weaver suggests he run in a zigzag pattern. Hee.

Sally gives Weaver Ejector’s test results. Weaver wants to know if she’s awake, and Sally leaves to check as Luka walks up to Weaver. They look at Ejector’s head CT, which is negative, just a little soft tissue swelling. Luka wants to know if she’s awake, but Weaver says she’s still sedated. Didn’t she just two seconds ago ask Sally the same question? This show can’t even keep the continuity in the same scene. Luka tells her that she can’t follow a neuro exam, but she replies that Ejector will wake up and they’ll extubate. Luka licks his lips sexily, because he can’t help it, and walks away as Sam walks up to the desk and says Weaver’s name. She has Ejector’s father with her, who is one of Dom DeLuise’s sons, but I forget which one and I really don’t feel like going back to the credits to check. Weaver takes Dom to his wife as Luka leans over the computer, and Sam is writing at the desk nearby. Frank comes up and asks them “aren’t you two supposed to keep fifty feet apart or something”, and Sam says “bite me, Frank” before I can tell him to shut up. She walks away and Frank tells Luka that if he asks him, Luka is better off. Luka singsongs that he didn’t. Funny delivery.

Lily! I don’t even remember the last time we saw her. How about bringing back Lydia, Yosh and Randi while you’re at it? Lily tells Abby that Holling is pain free after some meds she pushed. Kelly wants to know if that means he’s okay. Abby says it doesn’t look like a heart attack, but she thinks he has unstable angina. One of the arteries around his heart may be closing down, so he’ll have to stay in the hospital while they run more tests, but she thinks it’s just for a day or two. Kelly wants to know if he’s okay with it, and he bitches “like I got a choice”. Kelly smiles at him and tells him to hang in there. She winks at him, tells him she’ll stop by later and leaves. Abby chases after her. Abby wants her to stay, because the cardiologist may have some questions for her and her husband. Kelly corrects her that she’s not his wife, she’s his therapist. Abby asks if she’s a doctor. Kelly says she’s his “satisfaction facilitator”. Abby doesn’t know what that is, because Abby’s a bit dense. Kelly explains that she has a select group of clients that require something they are not getting at home. Abby still doesn’t get it, then it dawns on her and she says “Something … sexual.” Kelly nods and says that she provides the one thing that is missing that allows them to live happily ever after with their wives. I really don’t think your dad Hayden would approve of this, Kelly. Abby’s amused, she smiles and says “really?” Kelly explains that she helps women too. Abby cocks her head and nods. Kelly hands her a card and tells Abby to call her if Holling needs anything. Abby says okay and looks at the card as we hear Luka calling for some tests. Abby walks over to him in the Curtain Area where he is examining Blair. She asks “what’s this?” and he again disgustedly says “nursing home dump”, which I think is a really insensitive way of referring to a patient, even if she is in a vegetative state and probably can’t hear you. Luka bitches that he’s changing G-tubes on comatose patients now and asks her how her MI is. She replies that it’s unstable angina. Looking at the card, she asks him “just out of curiosity, what type of guy hires a satisfaction facilitator?” Luka narrows his eyes and looks at her questioningly, and she jokingly informs him that she believes it is the politically correct way of saying “call girl” these days. Luka raises his eyebrows, nods and says “a smart one?” Oh, no. Please don’t let this be the start of another round of Luka the Man-Ho. If we really have to relive a previous season, does it have to be Season 9??? Because honestly, except for Goran in the black turtleneck in “Hindsight” and the sexy sweating in the Congo, that whole season should have been a Bobby Ewing-back-from-the-dead-in-the-shower type dream sequence. Abby says “ah”, and Luka tells her that they have a saying in Croatia and proceeds to speak in Croatian which they really don’t allow him to do enough and damn it’s sexy. He translates “if it floats, flies, or …” and she fills in “fornicates?”, and he says “rent it”, and then he snorts. Hee. They grin at each other as Dubenko walks up to Abby. He and Luka exchange hellos, which is probably the most civil they’ve ever been to each other, and he asks Abby if she has a minute because he wants to take her up on the offer for coffee. She says sure and tells Luka to page her if he needs her. He nods grinning, as he walks away and Abby and Dubenko walk down the hall.

Judy wants to know how many stitches Neela put in. Neela tells her she has seven in her forehead and twelve on her cheek. Weaver brings Dom in and introduces him to Neela. Judy apologizes to Dom, who tells her it wasn’t her fault. He says the police told him what happened and that the bastards who did it should be shot. Judy tells him she tried to get away but she lost control, and he assures her that she did everything she could, and not to worry because the cops will get the guys. Judy asks if he’s seen Ejector, and he replies that she looks good and they think she’s going to be okay. Weaver tells her that they still have to run a few tests but that everything looks good and she’ll bring Ejector down as soon as she can. Weaver’s hair is an awful pumpkin shade. Not flattering. She’s looking a little puffy and plastic too. Dom tells Judy he’s going to go stay with Ejector until they are ready to bring her in to Judy. Then they exchange the obligatory “I love you’s”, Dom saying his particularly emphatically so that we know he is a serious actor, and he leaves. Neela puts an oxygen tube in Judy’s nose and tells her that Dom seems like a great guy. Judy starts crying. Neela tries to comfort her, but it comes out very wooden. Judy apologizes and says she’s not usually like this and cries harder. Neela purses her lips, which I think is supposed to look sympathetic, but really just makes her look constipated, and looks down at her chart.

Ray is in the call center telling a caller that the Venus flytrap is non-toxic, so it’s not lethal if ingested. And because he’s obviously seen Little Shop of Horrors, he then jokingly says that the larger ones are extremely dangerous and have been known to devour pets and small children. Nice, Ray. Really appropriate to be joking around on a Poison Control Hotline when you most likely have a distraught mother on the line. What an asshole. We hear a woman’s voice exclaim “oh my God, are you serious?” on the line, and Ray smilingly says that he made that last part up. The woman clearly starts ripping him a new one because he apologizes and says that she’s right, this is not the place for humor and he apologizes again as the woman hangs up on him. Dweeb is watching disapprovingly. Ray turns to him and asks “do you need any help with the snakes?” Dweeb leaves in a huff.

Abby is standing in the ambulance bay, presumably under some sort of cover because she doesn’t have her rain slicker’s hood up, but her hair is obviously wet. Weird. Dubenko is hurrying towards her with one hand holding a paper over his head and two coffees in the other hand. She tells him that they could have gone to the cafeteria, but he responds that the coffee there sucks as he hands her one. Under his breath he says “here we go”. He asks her if she told anyone else that she saw him upstairs, but she promises him she didn’t. She tells him that she wouldn’t have said anything to him but she thought that he might want to talk to somebody. Does she just assume that he doesn’t have any friends or anyone else he can talk to? And that of course he would want to talk to her because she’s wonderful and everyone always wants to spill their guts to her, even though they don’t really know each other very well and she’s sort of treated him with contempt in the past. God, sometimes she’s really annoying. I mean, I honestly like Abby, but sometimes her Savior complex is a bit much. He assures her that he appreciates the gesture. She asks him about his treatment options. He looks behind them and moves a box for her so she can sit down. He tells her he’s opted for a radical prostatectomy, which removes the entire prostate and some tissue around it. He says his urologist is Dr. Peter Singh and asks if she knows him. She doesn’t. Dr. Singh does a bilateral nerve-sparing procedure for patients like Dubenko with low volume disease. Abby says that’s great. Dubenko continues that unfortunately, even in the best circumstances, there’s a 25% chance of loss of erectile function. Abby’s eyes widen and she nods at him, apparently not liking the way this conversation is headed anymore than I am. Dubenko goes on about penile injection therapy, intraurethral pharmacotherapy, vacuum erection devices, or a penile prosthesis to achieve an adequate erection, as Abby starts to look away, getting more uncomfortable. Maybe that will teach you not to be such a buttinski, Abby. And Spellchecker likes “buttinski”. Hee. Stuttering, she says that the good news is that there’s a 75% chance of success. Dubenko informs her that the procedure also eliminates the ability to ejaculate, which makes her chew her lips, nod and go “uh huh”. He reports that the chance of urinary incontinence is relatively low so at least he won’t have to wear a diaper or need an artificial sphincter. She’s like “oh, well there you go”. Maura Tierney is absolutely great at acting ill at ease. Abby looks away, and Dubenko says “yeah”. Now Dubenko starts to stutter and says that it’s rather daunting knowing that you may never have sex again. Abby tells him it sounds like he’s in good hands, clearly trying to end this conversation as quickly as possible. He replies that he knows this is rather unconventional and under different circumstances he would have certainly employed a more traditional approach regarding courtship and romantic methodology. Abby’s not really looking at him and is sort of nodding along, clearly not getting where this is going. He goes on that he assuredly would have enjoyed all the ritual of that, and Abby, finally getting it, tilts her head back and stares at him. He resumes that given the time constraints and what he’s potentially faced with, and she tries to interrupt him, but he keeps going and says that if he’s going down, he wants to go down swinging and he’d like it to be with her, as we see lightning and hear thunder. She looks amused and says “so you want me to sleep with you?” and narrows her eyes at him. He smiles and says yes, and we hear an ambulance’s sirens in the background. She grins and looks down and disbelieving says “wow, that’s something”. She doesn’t really know what to say, but finally settles on telling him that she’s flattered, then glancing away says “I think”. Hee. But she tells him she can’t do that. He says he understands. She tells him it’s nothing personal, which is such a bad thing to say because it so is personal. Think she would have said no if it were Luka who asked her? Of course not, I said she was dense, not deranged. He tells her he was just asking purely from a scientific approach, which I guess is his way of covering since he had just gone over how he would have enjoyed a proper courtship. She’s looking down and nodding again. Then he asks her “what about after?” and closes his eyes and shakes his head at himself, knowing how desperate he sounds. She looks up and asks “after what?” Still shaking his head he says after the surgery, to see if everything still works. She tells him she’s going to have to take a pass on that, too. Hee. The ambulance has pulled in and Lily yells to Abby asking if she wants this, it’s a GSW to the chest. Of course she wants it and jumps up like a bat out of hell saying she better go. She then says “You want to hop on?”, closes her eyes when she realizes what she said and then tries “I mean, are you coming?”, which is even worse and she starts stammering. HA. He helps her out by telling her to place a chest tube and call him if the initial output is over 500 cc’s. I had been alternating between laughing and cringing throughout this entire conversation, but I laughed out loud at this last exchange. This whole discussion was entirely inappropriate and it made Dubenko seem a little pathetic. And a bit creepy. But his hair looked great wet. Leland Orser played this scene brilliantly, though I can’t imagine that either of these actors was too thrilled to do it. Also, this scene was so not a Public Service Announcement for Prostate Cancer awareness. After hearing Dubenko list the potential aftereffects, I can’t see many men running out to get screened. Anyway, Abby turned him down pretty decisively so I’m going to guess that there’s not going to be any big romance between these two. Abby puts her hood up and goes over to the ambulance.

Judy asks Neela how Ejector is. Neela says she’s been moved to one of the exam rooms. Fat Cop comes in with some mug shot books for Judy to look through. Judy says that it all happened so fast that she’s not really sure what she remembers seeing. Fat Cop wants her to take a look because a face might jog her memory. She yells that she can’t, which makes both Neela and Fat Cop look at her. Neela asks Fat Cop to step outside. Judy tells Neela she can’t look at those books. Neela wants to know why. Judy answers that it was pouring rain, she could barely see out the window, the car started to skid and she saw the wall coming but didn’t stop, she just kept driving. Neela ask her what she’s saying, what happened? Judy replies that she didn’t know Ejector’s car seat wasn’t clicked in. She assures Neela that she would never do anything to hurt her child. Neela wants to know if Judy did this on purpose. Judy sighs and says sometimes she can’t help it, she doesn’t know how to snap out of it and it’s like everything coming at her at once and she just wants it all to go away. Neela is staring at her. You really shouldn’t scowl like that Parminder, because you are starting to get a crease in your forehead and you are too young for Botox. Neela asks if she tried to hurt herself. Judy replies that she just wanted it to stop.

Neela approaches Luka and Weaver at Admit. She tells them she thinks Judy is suffering from severe postpartum depression. Inez comes up to tell Weaver that Ejector is waking up, if she wants to extubate. She walks away and Luka asks Neela what Judy’s symptoms are. Neela tells him that she thinks Judy intentionally drove into a wall with her baby in the car. She wants to put Judy on a psych hold. Dom comes up asking for Neela, while Luka tells her quietly to get Psych to come down. Dom wants to know if Judy can go home. Neela says not yet. Dom thought that since they moved Judy out of Trauma it meant she was ready to go home. Neela tells him they needed to clear the room and that they still have to rule out cardiac contusion. Her hair looks good in this scene, wavy, but not rain flattened. Neela asks Dom if Judy drinks alcohol. He looks at her questioningly and says she has a glass of wine now and then. Neela then asks about drugs. Dom says no and wants to know what it’s all about. Neela says they are routine questions for her chart, to avoid any drug interaction. And she’s scowling again. I’ve already warned you, Parminder. Neela wants to know if Dom’s noticed any mood change lately. He wants to know like what and Neela asks if she’s seemed depressed. He says no and Neela asks about loss of appetite or trouble sleeping. He asks her if she’s kidding because they have a three month old and I’m with him on that one. He just wants to take his wife and daughter home. Neela tells him she doesn’t want to send Judy home until she’s sure there’s no danger.

Sally asks Luka if he can help her clear some beds. Luka snottily replies that he thought he was. She asks if they can work together and wants to know what’s going on in Exam Two. They start going through the charts and deciding on a course of action for each patient. I’m again struck by how tall Kristen Johnston is. They get to Crystal Maranacchio who Luka says is waiting on an Ortho consult. Sally says she’s been cleared because Sally called the Attending. Luka says “you what?” Sally says it’s new policy. If a Resident doesn’t respond to a page in 60 minutes, they call the Attending. She tells him that all of the department heads signed off on it, except Psych because they are “crazy bastards”. Once again this show goes out of its way to trash the Psych Department. We haven’t seen competence there since Kim Legaspi left at the end of Season 7, unless you count Abby’s Super Med Student rotation in Season 10. Sally comments that Blair Collins has been there forever. Luka says he called the nursing home twice and they were supposed to be sending a ride. Sally says if it’s not there in 10 minutes, she’s going to put Blair in a cab. Luka replies that she’s comatose, and Sally explains that she was kidding.

Luka strides to the desk and yells for Frank to call the idiots at Blair Collins’ nursing home again and tell them she’s been ready to go for hours. Frank gets off the phone and tells Luka to do it himself because he’s busy. Yet again, shut up, Frank! A woman with a clipboard walks up to Luka and says “Dr. Kovac?” and introduces herself as Trish Gorham, Assistant Director of the nursing home and she is one of those idiots he was referring to. Luka, busted, tries to backpedal, but she lets him off the hook. Luka walks Trish over to Blair’s bed. He tells her that all Blair needs is IV antibiotics and that the G-tube could have been changed at the home. Trish replies that they are not staffed as well as the hospital and the gastro-neurologist doesn’t come out to the nursing home. Blair would have had to wait weeks for the G-tube to be changed. Luka wants to know if she has any family. Trish tells him no, her mother was killed in the crash that did this to Blair, and her boyfriend stopped coming around a long time ago. We hear a voice say “he didn’t even try to stop!” and see paramedics wheeling in a man on a gurney in the background. Luka excuses himself and goes over.

Patient is yelling for someone to call his son. Paramedics give the bullet as a 47 year old man who’s a victim of auto vs. pedestrian. Was it Abby’s coffee guy who hit him? Guy says he just ran out to get his kids some pizza and the driver didn’t even slow down. Luka’s listening to his chest and we see a huge bruise on his stomach. Luka says ecchymosis across the abdomen and pelvis. Google tells me that ecchymosis is, well, basically a bruise. Luka calls for four units of O-neg and prime the rapid infuser. Guy wants to know if he’s dying, Luka says no but tells him he may have some internal bleeding. Luka thinks his breaths are shallow, so they are going to intubate.

Dom is walking around with Ejector outside of Judy’s room. We see Neela and a man sitting talking to Judy. He’s asking Judy about how often she’s sad, which is not often, then what makes her happy, and she says Dom and Ejector. Shot switches to inside the room and oh, great, we see the Psychiatrist is Meyers. Have we seen him since Season 9? And again with the Season 9 references. Meyers did such a good job with Luka, so we know that Judy is royally screwed. Judy wants to know why they are asking all of these questions and Neela tells her checking mental status is routine after head injuries. Judy thinks her mental status is fine. Meyers wants to know if Judy has had thoughts about wanting to hurt herself. Judy hesitates, then jokes “not unless you count wanting to take a carving knife to my hips”. Shut up, Judy! You’re like a size 4. Bitch. Meyers asks if she ever thinks about wanting to hurt Ejector. Judy’s getting pissed and says “of course not”, then looks at Neela and asks what she told him. Neela tells her that she said she was upset and that she couldn’t snap out of it and that she wanted it all to stop. Judy is backpedaling big time and saying that she said she lost control of the car and couldn’t stop and that Neela’s putting words in her mouth. And Parminder is scowling again. Meyers tells her that it’s not uncommon for new moms to have bouts of depression and how stressful the first year can be. Judy angrily tells him that she’s not stressed or depressed, although she will be if she has to spend any more time there. She bitches at them to stop accusing her of being crazy and let her go. Neela swears that nobody is accusing her of anything and Meyers says they have to be extra careful when there’s a child involved. Judy exasperatedly replies that she appreciates their concern, but there is nothing wrong with her. Neela chews on her lips as Judy goes on that she’s had a rough day and just wants to take Ejector home and get some rest. Meyers tells her he hopes she recovers soon and gets up to leave. Judy’s eyes shoot daggers at Neela as she turns to follow him out.

They go out into the hallway and Dom asks if Judy’s ready to leave. Neela stalls him and says not yet, but tells him he can go back in. She goes over to Meyers and tells him that Judy’s changed her story. Meyers tells her there are no vegetative symptoms, no anhedonia, which is the inability to gain pleasure from normally pleasurable experiences (thanks again, Google), or have a depressed affect, and in fact Judy seems to be in good spirits. Neela tells him that something is going on, because Judy as much as confessed that she deliberately smashed her car. Meyers tells her that Judy’s not saying that now. Neela forcefully complains that Judy’s lying and starts to say that she’s a prime candidate for severe … but Meyers cuts her off and says that he wants to be sure that she doesn’t have postpartum depression just as much as Neela does. He explains that it is a difficult condition to diagnose and if the patient is in complete denial or lying to him, he not only can’t tell, he can’t hold her. Meyers is an idiot, but then again they’ve shown everyone in Psych to be, so what else is new. He tells Neela he gave Judy every opportunity to let them know. Shut up, Meyers! You were in there for about 2 minutes. Real thorough assessment. For a second I wish Neela were Abby so that she could roll her eyes at him, which is the appropriate reaction to that statement. He apologizes to Neela and walks away. Neela’s expression says “what the hell am I supposed to do now”.

Sally is pushing some guy in a wheelchair with one hand and carrying charts with another, so of course the charts dump onto the floor. Weaver comes over and asks if she needs a hand and Sally says she needs eight, as she and Sally start retrieving charts. Wheelchair man is complaining that something hurts. Weaver asks who he is. Sally responds that he’s the driver of the auto vs. pedestrian and Wheelchair is holding both of his hands up in front of him and his fingers are all bent up. He bitches that the guy ran out in front of him and asks them to please give him something. Sally tells Weaver he has no head or chest pain, and dismissively says he complains of bilateral thumb pain. He grumbles that he can’t even make a fist as Sally tells Weaver they don’t have any beds. Weaver says to park him and she’ll see what she can do. Neela comes up and informs Weaver that Psych is refusing to admit Judy. Weaver questions “Psych?”, and Neela explains that she believes the collision was deliberate. Weaver admits that she knows Neela suspects postpartum depression – then why ask about Psych? Obviously, she would have called them, Weaver. God, that’s infuriating. Weaver asks if Judy admitted it, and Neela responds “practically”. Neela runs down how Judy is overwhelmed, the baby seat wasn’t anchored, and she drove head on into a wall.

Close-up of the tank with the Hummel, again. Frank is answering the phone and immediately putting everyone on hold and wants to know if anyone has seen Jerry. Weaver, Neela and Sally walk up and Weaver explains that she sent him on an errand. Neela’s surprised and asks “you sent him out in this?” She adamantly states that you don’t send Jerry out in the rain, and Sally comments that she’s heard that too. Weaver’s all “what?” Neela thinks she should get DCFS involved, and it first I think she means about Jerry, which makes no sense, but realize she means Judy, which does. Weaver wants to know if she’s talked to Dom, because he might be able to convince her. Weaver thinks a voluntary admission would be better. Neela says she’ll try and walks away. Sam asks Franks where Jerry is. Frank whines that Weaver sent him on an errand. Sam’s shocked and says “oh, no, you didn’t”. Weaver wants to know what the big deal is. Sam responds that the “big man does not do well in the wet weather”. Weaver asks what the hell that means, as she walks away, not waiting for the answer. I guess the writers just want us to forget that Weaver has worked with Jerry for a gazillion years now and I’m sure would know if he had a problem going out in the rain. Don’t you just love plot contrivances?

Three kids come up to Sam at Admit looking for their dad who was hit by a car. Sam says the doctors are still treating him. Oldest kid is played by Daniel Clark, who was Sean Cameron on Degrassi: The Next Generation, and I really do need to get out of the house more. Sean is carrying his sister and says to Sam that they were told their dad got hit crossing the street and she tells them that the driver was talking on his cell phone and wasn’t paying attention and went right through the crosswalk. That’s one of my biggest pet peeves, especially since you can often find universal cell phone headsets that work just fine at the dollar store, like I did. Sam starts to take the kids back to see their dad when Sally stops her and says that she can go home now because she got a float from ICU to come down. Sam says she’s going to stay and help the kids. Sally tells her she’s welcome to do it, but she’s needs to be off the clock, which is fine by Sam, and she continues to take the kids down the hall.

Dom again wants to know if he can take Judy home. Neela tells him they’d like to keep her overnight for observation. Dom can’t believe it and wants to know why. Neela thinks Judy needs some help. Dom’s not understanding and says that he’s tried to talk her into a hiring a nanny, but Judy thinks it will make her feel like she’s less of a mother. Neela doesn’t mean that kind of help. Scowling yet again, Neela explains that she thinks Judy needs psychiatric help. Dom’s all “what?” Neela wants them to sit down. Right out there in the hallway. Great place for a private discussion, Neela. She paraphrases what Meyers told Judy earlier about how it’s not uncommon for new moms to be overwhelmed in the first year. Dom wants to know why she’s making a big deal out of this. Neela responds that it is usually short-lived and goes away once the baby gets into a routine and the mom’s hormones stabilize, but that sometimes it lasts longer and becomes more severe, developing into postpartum depression. Dom insists that’s not Judy. He says that she’s anxious to get back to work and she’s sometimes a little down about that, but that it’s normal. Neela replies that purposely trying to hurt yourself and your baby isn’t. He wants to know what she’s talking about, because Judy had an accident because she was forced off the road, but Neela says she doesn’t believe that’s what happened. Lily comes up and tells Neela she has a patient in Two. Neela says okay and asks Dom to talk to his wife and ask her what really happened in the car before walking away.

Luka is trying to intubate Guy. Dorie hangs an IV and Inez is bagging him, which after I first wrote that I realized that it sounded like she was bagging Luka, in which case I’d say smart girl. Luka says they need the rapid infuser and Dorie replies that it’s in Curtain Four and she’ll get it. Luka tells Inez to turn on the suction. Inez says that it’s on and Luka tells her it’s not. She says she has it on high but Luka says he’s not getting anything. Oh, Luka, I’ll give you something. Sally’s watching this exchange and tells Inez to go next door and help Abby with the chest tube. Luka bitches to Sally “I’m not allowed to work with any of the nurses now?” Luka’s bitching a lot this episode, but he’s so cute when he does it that I forgive him. He pissily tells her that he needs suction because he can’t see the cords and Sally tells him to hold his horses while she's fiddling with the machine. She explains that the suction container wasn’t sealed properly and he glares at her before resuming the intubation. She looks at him and sarcastically says “you’re welcome” before handing him a tube. Dorie brings in the infuser as Sally goes in to Trauma Green.

Abby is working on the GSW victim. She’s putting in a chest tube and asks Inez for O-silk. Inez doesn’t give it to her and Abby asks again, adding impatiently “come on”. Inez hands it to her. Abby says she wants to auto-transfuse the patient, but Inez apparently doesn’t know what she means, so Sally steps in and tells her to go back and help Luka. She bends a little as she grabs Inez by the arm and hello Sally’s cleavage! Didn’t need to see that. Inez goes back into Trauma Green.

Inez asks Luka what he needs. He spouts off some things ending with a t-pod, and Inez asks what it is. Dorie grumbles “Fine, I’ll get it … again”. Shut up, Dorie! You’ve had like two lines in all the years you’ve appeared on this show and you waste one of them bitching about a fellow nurse. You’ve been annoying ever since you played Mr. Edwards adopted daughter Alicia on Little House on the Prairie when you were a kid. Wow, I really am pathetic. Inez asks Luka what he wants her to do first. He tells her to find the O-neg as Sally yells in asking if everything’s okay. Luka tells her “for the time being” as he snaps off his gloves. He wants Inez to order four units of type specific, and she says she will after she gets the IV hung. Luka sees Sam in the hallway and yells for her. She comes in and he tells her Guy has a hypotensive pelvic fracture and “needs the works”. Sam tells Luka that Guy’s kids are out there and Luka shouts to Frank to take them to the Family Room. Sally looks worriedly at Luka and Sam and says she’ll be right in. Super Nurse Sam of course takes over, anticipating Luka’s every need in the trauma. Luka has gloves on again. Why did he take them off in the first place and when did he put new ones on? Luka wants to know where Dorie is with the t-pod, and Sam gets some off a shelf in the room. See Dorie, don’t know as much as you think you do. Bitch. Sam hands Luka instruments before he asks for it, and he looks at her approvingly. Sally comes in asking where they need her, but Sam says they are all set. Sally thanks her and tells her she’ll take it from there. Sam glances at Luka and says she’ll go see about the kids.

Dom is telling Fat Cop that his wife really can’t say what happened and she had a pretty good whack to the head. Fat Cop says there’s not much they can do if she doesn’t identify the guys. Dom replies that it’s okay because she’s not sure what she remembers and doesn’t even know if it was intentional. Neela overhears all of this. Fat Cop’s pissed and tells Dom to let him know if his wife changes her mind and walks away shaking his head. Neela tells Dom he did the right thing and the next step is to get his wife some help, but he thinks the next step is to take her home. He walks away saying that Judy isn’t crazy, she had an accident. Neela would rather she chose to stay rather than have Psych put her on a forced hold. Dom tells her Judy’s going to be fine and for her to just leave them alone.

Dorie and Luka are wheeling Guy towards the elevators as Sam and the kids walk behind. Sam is explaining what is going on with their dad. She tells them that Guy has a broken pelvis and that he’s bleeding inside. She says he’s lost a lot of blood and they need to know that it’s serious. Sean blames himself and says it should have been him because he was supposed to go get the pizza, but he didn’t want to go out in the rain. Wheelchair is in the background on his cell phone – isn’t that not allowed in a hospital? – complaining how some “pizza guy” just walked out in front of him. Sean hears him, calls him a “jerk off” – remember when they used to now be allowed to say that on TV? – and goes after him. He grabs Wheelchair’s phone and throws it yelling about “what was so damn important” that he was talking on the phone while he was driving. Sean grabs him and starts shaking him, and Luka pulls him off saying “that’s enough”. Wheelchair complains for them to keep Sean away from and Luka tells him to shut up. Luka calms Sean down saying that he know he’s mad, but his dad’s condition is serious and his brother and sister need him. Sam says she’ll take them to the Family Room.

Inez stops Luka and says that one of his patients is getting agitated. He asks which one and she says the girl from the nursing home. Luka informs her that Blair’s in a coma and Inez says “not anymore”. Luka walks over as a nurse helpfully pulls back the curtain just as he walks up. Wasn’t that convenient? Blair is awake and looking around. Luka introduces himself. Blair wants to know where her mom is. She’s having no problem speaking after having been in a coma for six years? So realistic. Camera zooms in on Luka’s disturbed face because he looks so pretty.

After commercial, Luka is trying to get Blair to hold her hands up, but she’s having a little trouble keeping them raised. She wants to know what’s wrong with her. Luka’s clearly conflicted about what to tell her, so he asks her what the last thing she remembers is. She says she and her mom were going to the mall and it was snowing. She asks if they were in an accident. He doesn’t answer so she asks if her mom is okay. He doesn’t know what to say, so stutters that he wasn’t the one to treat her but he’ll see what he can find out, and smiles at her reassuringly. He walks over to Sam and raises his eyebrows. She asks how Blair is and he says she doesn’t remember anything. Sam wants to know what Luka is going to tell her but he doesn’t know. “Your mother’s dead, and you’ve been in a coma for six years?” Yeah, I think that would be a real good idea, Luka. Except, not. He asks Sam how the kids are doing. She got a hold of some relatives who are with them now. Sally walks behind Luka and asks Inez to walk with her. Sam thinks she should get in on this and follows.

Sally tells Inez that she thinks she has potential, but that she’s got to be in there honing her skills at every spare moment. Sam asks Sally if she’s got a second and Sally dismisses her “not really”. Sam keeps going and gets in Sally’s face that if she’s so concerned with the efficiency of the department then she needs to let those who work well together to continue to do so. Inez looks back and forth between them. Sally starts to ask Sam if she’s referring to something, but Sam interrupts snottily that if Sally wants them to act like professionals she needs to treat them that way. She continues that Sally saw how well she and Luka worked together and if it didn’t prove that they can work the same shift, then obviously Sally doesn’t know her job as well as she thinks she does. Sam’s projecting a serious attitude, but instead of calling her on it, Sally’s a bit amused and asks her if she feels better and tells her “FYI, I already changed the schedule. You’re back on your old shifts next week”, totally knocking Sam off her high horse. Sally walks away and Sam says “thank you”. Then she smiles at Inez and tells her not to worry, she’ll get the hang of it and relates how when she first started she could barely hook up an IV. Inez says she felt like an idiot and Sam offers to help her when she needs it.

Lily is taking GSW up to surgery and Abby wants to be paged when he’s out. She spots Kelly and states the obvious that “she’s back”. Kelly says that she had a cancellation and asks how Holling is. Abby starts to walk her over and Kelly says she was calling his cell, but he didn’t answer. What is with these people and cell phones in the hospital? Abby says he’s doing great and they are just waiting for him to be taken up to the cath lab. Kelly thinks that sounds ominous. As they enter Holling’s room, Abby explains that they are going to do an angioplasty, which is a procedure where they insert a catheter into a blood vessel in his leg, thread it up to his coronary artery, which is used to inflate a balloon that will open up the blockage. Holling guesses the cheese steaks have caught up with him. Considering the amount of grease that accumulates on those things, I think that’s a pretty safe guess, Holling. Kelly comments that she’s been telling him to eat better for years. Someone who is obviously Mrs. Holling comes rushing over. He’s all happy to see her and doesn’t seem to be the least bit concerned that Kelly is standing there. Weird. Kelly’s smiling at Mrs. Holling and Abby seems a bit amused by this situation. Holling introduces Mrs. Holling, who’s smiling obviously wanting to know who Abby and Kelly are. Abby glances at Kelly, then introduces herself. Holling tells Mrs. Holling that everything is okay, that he has a little blockage, but they are going to fix it. Mrs. Holling looks at Kelly and says “I didn’t get your name”. Kelly introduces herself as “Shawna” and has a really cheesy grin on her face. And her eyebrows are either way over-plucked, or she’s shaved them off and penciled ones in. She shakes Mrs. Holling’s hand, as Holling finally has the grace to look down a bit abashed. Mrs. Holling wants to know who Kelly is and Abby helpfully says “therapist”, and then adds “from Cardiology”. Kelly keeps up the goofy grin. Mrs. Holling doesn’t seem to buy it so Kelly starts to repeat verbatim what Abby just told her about the angioplasty. That seems to appease Mrs. Holling. Kelly says “Good luck, Mr. Rappaport” which it took 45 minutes before we learned that is Holling’s last name. She says she has to get back to her other “patients” and leaves. Abby excuses herself and follows Kelly out.

In the hall, Kelly thanks Abby for covering for her and says she owes her. She then tells Abby that if she ever needs a sex therapist, but Abby says “I … I think I’m good”. Hee. She looks over and sees Dubenko at Admit and says to Kelly “Now that you mention it. Do you ever do any pro bono work?” And because I’m twelve, I giggle like Beavis and Butthead because I heard this as “pro boner”.

Neela is on the phone at Admit telling someone how she disagreed with Meyers’ assessment and is asking for a second assessment from another attending. Jerry pushes past her and Weaver asks him where he’s been because she was getting worried about him. She jokingly says that everyone was acting as if she sent him out in a hurricane. She asks him if he’s okay. He holds up a scorched bag from the toy store and hands it to her. She pulls out a blackened Care Bear and asks “what the hell happened to King Funshine?” Great delivery on that line. Frank asks Jerry if he got hit by lightning again and Jerry nods. Weaver laughing says that he didn’t get hit by lightning and Jerry holds up her change, that has been fused together. Hee. Weaver gets panicky and tells Jerry they are going to get him on a cardiac monitor and starts ordering tests.

Neela is still on the phone trying to get the other Psychiatrist to come down by saying this is about the welfare of a mother and her child, and apparently the attending agrees to have a look because Neela gets excited and literally jumps up and down. She calls to Weaver who is examining Jerry and makes sure that if asked, Weaver agrees with her assessment, and Weaver says sure. Neela spots Dom and Judy starting to leave with Ejector. She rushes to stop them. She tells them she has good news and that one of the Attendings upstairs has agreed to come down to speak with them. They blow her off and say they are going home. Neela tries to get them to stay but they keep on walking. Neela pleads with them that she just wants what’s best for her and the baby, and Dom tells her to leave them alone. Neela implores Judy that she needs to speak with someone. Dom says she just needs to rest. Neela knows she doesn’t want to hurt herself or Ejector, but she needs professional help. Judy asks if Neela has children and she says she doesn’t. Dom wants to know how she knows what she’s talking about. Um, maybe all the years of med school and her residency? She follows them outside into the rain. Dom says that his wife has “a touch of the baby blues and you want to lock her up?” Neela says she doesn’t want to lock anyone up, she just wants Judy to get the help she needs. Dom snottily responds “oh, by giving her drugs?” Calm down, Dom Cruise. Neela rightfully tells them that ignoring this is not going to make it go away, as Dom places Ejector car seat in the back of a car. He obviously doesn’t click her in, so it must be a habit with these two. Neela is really beseeching them that this needs to be treated like any other disease. And she’s getting soaked and her hair is sticking to her face. She’s shouting that this could happen again and that it could be worse. They completely ignore her, get in the car and drive away. Neela watches after them, but weirdly she seems to be looking up, as if their car pulled a Back to the Future move and started floating in the air. Maybe she’s just watching the camera, because this is a crane shot and it pulls up and away. I have a feeling we’ll be seeing this family again.


8 Comments:

At 7:19 PM, October 16, 2005, Blogger Sharon said...

great recap of a meh episode.

 
At 9:57 AM, October 18, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Love your recaps. Especially the Abby/Dubenko scene.

 
At 11:25 PM, October 18, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks for recapping! Since TWOP stopped recapping, I've found a great one to read. Thanks!

 
At 12:15 PM, October 19, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hehehe.. I *liked* the Abby/Dubenko scene. He's always been such a geek, that his approach was completely plausible!

As always - thanks for recap. You make me laugh!

 
At 1:52 PM, October 19, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thanks ))))

 
At 3:32 PM, October 19, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

The "dom cruise" comment made me laugh like crazy- LOVE your recaps!!

 
At 12:04 PM, October 20, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Actually, the surgical staff wore blue scrubs while the ER wears green.

But great recaps! I wondered where I was going to get my ER Snark Fix.

 
At 3:50 AM, October 24, 2005, Anonymous Anonymous said...

1205 ? please!!! please!!! :)

 

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